Oh, everyone knows I don’t get riled up easily. It takes a lot to rile me up.
It’s been a hot minute since someone really tested my nerves, and I don’t know why, maybe because I’m just overly passionate.
I had a discussion with someone, and while they were talking, they were like, “Oh, you know, I like you. You are a very lovely lady. And one of the things that I like about you is, in as much as you’re a Christian, you’re not a church girl. And that really makes you stand out.”
When they said it, I laughed.
I replied, “I’m not a church girl? Really? What makes you think that?”
And he replied, “You’re not churchy like all those other girls who carry church on their heads.”
I took a deep breath, and I replied, ” I am a church girl. Through and through. I’m always going to be a church girl. I will never not be a church girl. I don’t know what your definition of what a church girl is, but by standards, I am a church girl.”
Me! Fọláṣadé?
I don’t think I can go an hour in a conversation without bringing God into it. I don’t think a day goes by that I don’t talk about God, church, love, or faith. I don’t know how to. I just can’t help it.
I don’t make decisions without praying about it. I have long since consecrated myself to the Father, and hold no attachment to any carnal, or humane things.
And y’all know I talk a lot, I went on and on. My words were starting to shock him and take him aback.
He then said “Yes, but you’re not like a ‘church girl, church girl'”
And it just got me thinking that, really, what is a church girl?
Because I don’t seem to get what this person is talking about. And it made me wonder that, when did being a church girl become something that anyone should be shy of?
When did it become something that would be frowned upon in a conversation?
I would plaster of God on my forehead. If I could, that’s how much I love him, and how much I want the gospel to spread, and how much I want to tell the world about Jesus and my experience with him. So it doesn’t make sense to me that anyone would not want to be identified as a church girl.
I do not go a day without trying to plug into what the Holy Spirit has for me for that day. There are some things that I am inconsistent with, you know, it’s a battle of the flesh. But to a large extent, there are some parts of my life that I have narrowed down. When did it become something that we’re not proud of, to say that we’re church folks?
I am happy to spend all Sunday in church, from listening to the Word, to worshipping, to the people that I have fellowship with. It excites me. I want to give all of myself to the church.
I remember earlier on in my Christian journey, my pastor at that point in time just randomly asked who feels like they are being underworked. This might be me paraphrasing what he said now. I raised up my hand. That’s how much I wanted to give myself.
But to be fair, I get where he’s coming from a bit. People are always surprised to see others who have a good balance between life and ‘religion’. That you have have good social skills within the boundaries of morals and yet melt in the presence of God.
But isn’t that the sweet spot anyway?
I would never, ever want to be deemed anything but a church girl. I would never, ever want anyone to see me and see anything but God. That means taking a stand.
As long as I want to hold on to things, and to conform to the norms that have been set by society and all, I can never truly claim to have consecrated myself to the Father.
It’s not something you’d ever hear me stop talking about. I would always keep talking about the fact that I’m a church girl. I’m proudly a church girl. And that’s a fact.
To all my church folks out there, here’s a big shout-out.
That conversation just rebirthed so many things that I want to say inside of me, from where the balance between Christianity as a practice, and the boundaries of the human existence lies.
But all of that is going to be a topic for another day. In the meantime, remember to spread nothing but love this week, and keep reaching for the stars.
